If you've found your way to this website, it's likely that you have a child who is deeply attached to a blanket, teddy bear, or other favorite toy, and they just don't want to let go.

Your child carries this object everywhere, never wants to part with it, and fears that it will be taken or that something unfortunate will happen to it.

In social situations, your child becomes withdrawn, clinging to their object instead of engaging and making meaningful connections with others.

Even though your child has friends and is getting older, they still insist on carrying their object everywhere they go.

And as parents, you yearn for your child to embrace a world beyond their security object. You want them to experience freedom and open themselves up to building social relationships with children their own age. However, when you ask your child to release their grip on the object, they resist with all their might and simply don't want to let go.

why is this happening?

When I explored the subject, it was explained to me why this phenomenon occurs.

Naturally, when a child is born, they become deeply attached to their parents, especially their mother. As the child grows, they come to realize that they and their mother are separate individuals. The thought of losing such a significant part of themselves, a part that magically fulfills all their needs, can cause immense anxiety. 

The young child has not yet internalized the concept of "object permanence," which is the understanding that the separated parent will reappear regularly and consistently. This lack of assurance can intensify the developing anxiety. 

In response to this, the tender child embraces a particular object that symbolizes the comforting sensations provided by their parents. It could be a torn cloth diaper, a blanket ("Blankie"), a doll, or any other item. This object is commonly known as a "transitional object," a term coined by the psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott.

The child projects their feelings and imagination onto the object and isn't ready to part with it or let it go.

What can be done?

Here are some tips based on my personal experience:

• First and foremost, patience is key. We want to support and encourage our child without being judgmental. It's important to show patience and empathy.

•  Avoid making a big fuss about it. It's better to approach the issue casually to avoid triggering a power struggle. 

• Explain the situation. Offer your child the option to leave the object in its designated place, a safe and protected spot, and explain why it's beneficial to do so.

For instance, I explained to my daughter that Bibi should stay in bed because it's its special place where it won't get dirty and will be kept safe. I also explained that by putting Bibi in its place, her hands would be free to engage in activities like drawing, building tower blocks, playing catch, and many other enjoyable activities.

• Compliment your child. If they agree to let go of the object for a period of time, praise them! Remind them that you believed in their capability.

• Read books on the subject with your child. Share stories about characters who can serve as inspiration. Sometimes kids need just a little inspiration to make a change.

Personally, I recommend reading "Popina and Slumberina."

With humor and warmth, this rhyming picture book filled with charming illustrations takes young readers on a journey of growth and self-discovery.

The child can relate to Popina and find inspiration and a positive role model in her.

In the book, Popina grows up and independently says goodbye to her blanket, without feeling pressured or judged. Repeated readings of the book will reinforce messages of capability and a sense of security.

Reading "Popina and Slumberina" helped my daughter make the decision to let go of her beloved blankie, without feeling pressured, as she realized she no longer needed it.

I hope this book will help you too. 

Good luck! I believe in you!